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Saying goodbye to an old friend

14 Jan

Letting some friends go is really hard, some it is a blessing in disguise, and some your heart never really heals from.  I have had to say goodbye to a whole lot of people in the course of this life, some from death, some from growing up and growing apart, some from misunderstandings that never got resolved and probably never will.  It is a rare occasion in my life that I am the one to initiate the goodbye.  I value my friendships very much.  I have lots of friends from my childhood who I still talk to and love very much.  A week ago today, I said goodbye.  I am the one that severed the tie.  I am the one that walked away without looking back once.  Deep in my heart I will always love this friend, selfishly so.  There isn’t a day that I wake up that I don’t think of them.  I know with time that will go away and I will think of them less often, then there will be the day I realize that I HAVEN’T thought of them in weeks, and that will make me sad.  I remember the first time we met.  Another one of my friends introduced me in 7th grade, I was 14 years old.  At first, we didn’t get along.  Eventually though, we went everywhere together, totally inseparable.  We cruised in the car together, went to class together, had sleep overs, stayed up late figuring out the problems of the world.  This friend made me feel great always.  I would say that we were best friends for at least 15 years.  After college and the really scary phase of “early 20’s” had passed, I started to see this friend a little differently.  This friend was a little selfish, and really demanding of my time and money.  After marriage and two kids, it was a lot more apparent that there wasn’t room for the friend and my family.  I knew that this was the one friend of mine that my wife hated.  But how could I turn my back after 15 years?  It was harder than I thought it would be.  I have mourned a few friendships that have stuck with me for longer than a few days.  This one is one of those friendships.  I know there are some friendships that tear us apart, there are a few people that I would let back into my life still, some that I will always love no matter what distance separates us.  This friend, I have to just sever all ties, I have to say goodbye and mean it.  So dear can of chew, I will always love you, I will never forget the things that we went through together, I will never forget that you were always there for me with no questions asked.  You are bad for me and I can’t depend on you anymore.  I hope life treats you well. 

 

Love, Kylee

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Posted by on January 14, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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